the gifts of imperfection brené brown

25 Empowering The Gifts of Imperfection Quotes

As you read through Brené Brown’s The Gifts of Imperfection, quotes will leap off the page and leave a profound impact on you. Each sentence and paragraph carries an empowering message, encouraging readers to embrace their true selves and live with an open heart. 

The Gifts of Imperfection is much more than your average self-help book. It is truly the most transformative book I have ever read.

Brené Brown provides a collection of powerful insights that highlight the importance of living authentically as a daily practice in order to cultivate a wholehearted life.

The Gifts of Imperfection guides readers on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth, challenging us to view our imperfections as valuable aspects of our true selves. It gently reminds us that letting go of the need for perfection is essential to embracing our worthiness and experiencing true happiness.

Through this process, the book teaches us to release the twenty-ton shield of self-judgment and shame that weighs us down, and instead, to cultivate a resilient spirit capable of withstanding the storms of life.

As a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser, reading this book felt like it was somehow looking right into my soul and speaking directly to all of the painful feelings of shame I’ve carried with me over the years. 

In her New York Times Bestseller, Brené Brown expertly addresses the discomfort of vulnerability that I have often struggled with as one of the greatest barriers to wholehearted living.

She challenges the reader to a healthy striving for authenticity by explaining that self-love and compassion are not just feel-good ideas, but the foundation for building a fulfilling, meaningful life.

Brené Brown’s writing is deeply relatable, especially for those of us who have faced pain and struggled with letting go of our fear of uncertainty, or the numbing of emotions that comes from perfectionism.

As a research professor and storyteller, her unique lens allows readers to see their own experiences mirrored in her words, helping them connect to their own powerful selves.

Below, you’ll find some of my favorite The Gifts of Imperfection quotes. I’ve organized the best quotes around the book’s key points to make it easier for you to pick out the ones that are most relevant to your own story. Each quote serves as a stepping stone toward embracing your authentic self and letting go of any barriers to self-acceptance.

As the book’s tagline promises, these inspirational quotes will help you ‘embrace who you are and let go of who you think you are supposed to be‘.

Brene Brown's the Gifts of Imperfection

If you are interested in a more in-depth summary of this amazing book, check out our The Gifts of Imperfection summary, or grab a copy of this highly recommended book for yourself!

The Gifts of Imperfection is available in: print | digital | audiobook

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The Gifts of Imperfection Quotes About Courage

The first ‘gift’ that Brené Brown explores in The Gifts of Imperfection is the courage to be our true selves. Brené Brown explains that this kind of courage is not about grand, heroic acts. Instead, she explains that the bravest thing we can do is to show up authentically in our lives by embracing our imperfections. 

This type of courage is about having the inner strength to be vulnerable and share the parts of ourselves that we often hide behind our twenty-ton shield of perfectionism.

The Gifts of Imperfection explains that courage is about speaking and acting with our whole heart, even when fear or uncertainty threatens to silence us. It involves confronting the discomfort of vulnerability and resisting the urge to numb emotions when we feel exposed. This courage is deeply tied to your place of worthiness, or the ability to accept that you are enough and live as though it’s true.

The following Brené Brown Gifts of Imperfection quotes capture the essence of what it means to live courageously and let go of the fear of the dark. They remind us that true courageous acts come from acknowledging our painful emotions, sharing our shame stories with a sense of perspective, and choosing to show up wholeheartedly despite the risks.

  • “Speaking honestly and openly about who we are, about what we’re feeling, and about our experiences, (good or bad) is the definition of courage.”
  • “Asking for what you need is one of the bravest things you’ll ever do.”
  • “Courage has a ripple effect. Every time we choose courage, we make everyone around us a little better and the world a little braver. And our world could stand to be a little kinder and braver.”
  • “Loving and accepting ourselves are the ultimate acts of courage.”

These quotes demonstrate that embracing courage isn’t about the absence of fear. Instead, courage is about feeling fear and moving forward anyway. 

Courage is the practice of living with an open heart, accepting our flaws, and striving to become the best version of ourselves. By choosing courage, we begin to cultivate the resilient spirit needed to transform our lives.

Two people connecting with one another

Quotes About Compassion from The Gifts of Imperfection

The second ‘gift’ that Brené Brown explores is compassion. Drawing from the teachings of American Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön, Brené Brown emphasizes that true compassion involves acknowledging our own pain, imperfections, and the shared human experience. 

Only when we understand the power of vulnerability and confront the discomfort that comes with it can we extend a helping hand to others.

Often, when others experience painful emotions, it is easy to fall into the trap of judgment, blame, or the urge to fix things. Brené Brown highlights that true compassion requires us to set aside these automatic responses and instead engage with an open heart.

This means sharing the darkness with those who are struggling, being present in their pain, and practicing empathy instead of judgment or numbing.

Brené Brown also addresses the complex dynamic of holding others accountable while still embodying compassion. This balance is part of healthy striving and understanding the irreducible need for connection that all human beings share. It means recognizing that we can be firm and hold boundaries while still leading with love and understanding.

The following Brené Brown Gifts of Imperfection quotes invite you to reflect on how to embrace your true self, cultivate a deep sense of love, and develop the courage to show up authentically in relationships:

  • “Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It is a relationship between equals.” – Pema Chödrön
  • “It’s hard for us to understand that we can be compassionate and accepting while we hold people accountable for their behaviors. We can, and, in fact, it’s the best way to do it.” – Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection
  • “Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” – Pema Chödrön
  • “We can confront someone about their behavior, or fire someone, or fail a student, or discipline a child without berating them or putting them down. The key is to separate people from their behaviors – to address what they are doing, not who they are.”– Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

These quotes remind us that compassion is not about avoiding the messiness of life. Instead, compassion is about embracing the messiness fully! 

It requires a zoom lens on our shared humanity, letting go of life paralysis, and stepping forward with the courage to connect, even when it feels vulnerable. By cultivating compassion, we transform our pain and help others do the same, nurturing a resilient spirit that sustains our relationships and fosters deeper spiritual connection.

Quotes About Connection

The third ‘gift’ that Brené Brown explores is connection, which she defines as “the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued.” 

Connection is a fundamental aspect of the human condition and a deep need we all share. When we feel this sense of true belonging, we are empowered to embrace our true selves and live wholeheartedly without fear of judgment, blame, or the need to please others.

Connection is more than just a fleeting moment of interaction. Instead it is about establishing a space of worthiness and being able to show up as our authentic selves in an honest way on a daily basis. 

Brené Brown emphasizes that true connection requires vulnerability and a willingness to let go of perfectionism. It requires us to share the parts of ourselves that feel raw, uncomfortable, or imperfect. This is the only way to experience a real life that’s grounded in self-acceptance, self-love, and the knowledge that we are already enough.

However, Brené Brown also warns about the dangers of mistaking the illusion of connection for the real thing. In our digital status symbol driven world, it’s easy to mistake superficial interactions for meaningful relationships.

Taking time to step away from the numbing distractions of technology and spending quality time with the people who truly see and value us on a regular basis is a key component of building a resilient spirit.

The following Brené Brown Gifts of Imperfection quotes will help you explore the power of connection and the freedom it brings to live in alignment with your values:

  • “I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgement; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”
  • “In our technology-crazed world, we’ve confused being communicative with feeling connected. Just because we’re plugged in, doesn’t mean we feel seen and heard.”
  • “The willingness to tell our stories, feel the pain of others, and stay genuinely connected in this disconnected world is not something we can do halfheartedly.”
  • “We are wired for connection to thrive emotionally, physically, spiritually, and intellectually.”
  • “Somehow we’ve come to equate success with not needing anyone. Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we’re very reluctant to reach out for help when we need it ourselves.”

These inspirational quotes show that connection is about cultivating relationships that support our emotional well-being, while allowing each beautiful imperfection to be seen without shame. When we let go of the need for external validation and strive for a wholehearted life, we create space for real, authentic connection and the transformative power it brings.

The Gifts of Imperfection Quotes about Perfectionism and Self-Compassion

Much of The Gifts of Imperfection is dedicated to uncovering and dismantling the unhealthy belief systems that drive perfectionism. Brené Brown defines perfectionism as the addictive belief system that if we live perfectly, look perfectly, and act perfectly, we can avoid the pain of blame, criticism, and shame. 

Perfectionism hampers success because it keeps us trapped in a cycle of self-judgment and life paralysis, preventing us from taking risks and showing up as our true selves.

Brené encourages readers to use self-compassion as an antidote to perfectionism. She contrasts perfectionism with healthy achievement, which is rooted in self-worth rather than external approval.

When we strive for healthy achievement, we set goals that align with our values and aspirations, rather than goals driven by the fear of disappointing others. This shift allows us to let go of the need to be flawless and, instead, to embrace the beautiful imperfection of each human weakness.

For those who aim to do their best and want to be the best version of themselves, understanding the difference between perfectionism and healthy striving is crucial. Brené Brown’s insights are particularly helpful for parents, leaders, and friends who want to model healthy behaviors for the important people in their lives. 

The following list contains my favorite quotes from The Gifts of Imperfection that invite you to dig deep into the roots of your perfectionism and choose self-compassion as a path toward true happiness and inner strength:

  • “Life paralysis refers to all of the opportunities we miss because we’re too afraid to put anything out in the world that could be imperfect. It’s also all of the dreams that we don’t follow because of our deep fear of failing, making mistakes, and disappointing others.”
  • “Perfectionism never happens in a vacuum. It touches everyone around us. We pass it down to our children, we infect our workplace with impossible expectations, and it’s suffocating for our friends and families.
  • “Perfection didn’t lead to results. It led to peanut butter.”
  • “Many of us think that being mindful means not avoiding painful emotions. Mindfulness also means not over-identifying with or exaggerating our feelings.”
  • “So many of us run around spackling all of the cracks, trying to make everything look just right…remember the beauty of the cracks…our imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together. Imperfectly, but together.”
  • “Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, its the thing thats really preventing us from taking flight.”
  • “Shame is the birthplace of perfectionism”
  • “Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. It is not about healthy achievement or growth. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgement, and shame.”
  • “When we become more living and compassionate with ourselves and we begin to practice shame resilience, we can embrace our imperfections.”
  • “Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect. Perfection is an unattainable goal.”

For more inspiration to embrace your imperfections, check out our Brené Brown definition poster set.

brene brown quote posters

You Are Imperfect and Worthy!

One of most important ideas that is developed throughout The Gifts of Imperfection is the importance of worthiness in living a wholehearted life. This is directly related to embracing our imperfections and knowing that we are worthy no matter what.

As Brené Brown writes, we are:

“Worthy now. Not if. Not when. We are worthy of love and belonging now. Right this moment. As is.

This definition highlights the need to let go of perfectionism and the cultural importance placed on external validation.

the word 'worthy' written with Scrabble tiles

As a final quote, consider this quote from Brené Brown about wholehearted living that I believe summarizes The Gifts of Imperfection:

“Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging”.

Looking for more powerful Brené Brown quotes? Check out our list of 50 Brené Brown quotes about gratitude and each of her subsequent books for more inspiration to embrace yourself for who you are.

Don’t forget to share this post with your friends and family on social media! Sharing these quotes could make a difference in helping them embrace themselves for who they are!


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